This week, in class we talked about the suffering of Christ in Gethsemane, and his finishing the preparations in order that we may all be saved. What happened there we may not now, nor can we tell the pains He had to bear. But we believe it was for us, he died and suffered there. I loved learning about Him and feeling that closeness to my Savior as I come to try to know Him and the overwhelming love He must have felt in order to go through with this act that triumphed all other moments in all history. It was the culmination, it was the victorious moment, the agonizing moment we had exercised faith in for millenia in the pre existence and which all people everywhere will have to have faith in in order to continue on the pathway to Him. His suffering was beyond comprehension, and nothing I can say can begin to describe the extent to which He felt the deepest of pain and suffering for us. However, as Christ speaks of this moment in D&C 19:15-19, He says very swiftly that the glory be to the Father, and not to Him. After being designated as the Savior and preparing to do this, given that He had given Him the powers of heaven, that His is the priesthood, why would He give the glory to the Father. I understood humility but I also knew that credit is due where credit is due especially if it points us in the right direction. For years I didn't understand why He gives the credit to the Father.
Looking back now, I think part of my confusion came because I didn't understand what it is like to be a Father, and I forgot to always remember who allows all this to be possible. The question was asked in class, that if the sacrifice of Isaac by Abraham was is in similitude of Heavenly Father allowing His perfect Son to die for us, to offer himself a sacrifice for sin, who had the harder part? Isaac willingly gave himself as he talked to his father for no 30 year old can be over powered and tied down to an altar by someone well over 100 years old. He willingly gave himself for obedience, but who had the harder part between Isaac and Abraham? Imagine looking your only son in the eyes as you prepare the altar and the knife. Imagine the love ripping his heart apart as he realizes the reality of what he is about to do. Imagine his thoughts drifting to his dear wife, whom he will have to tell very soon that he has just killed her only son she bore in her old age. Imagine that agony, and perhaps it will be a small glimpse into what Heavenly Father must have experienced that night. Christ was perfect and had all power to stop but He drank the cup as the wrath of an All Mighty God was released on the only one who never deserved a single morsel of it. That justice would be felt and satisfied by the only one who never needed to feel it. The love Heavenly Father had for His perfect Son is expressed many times, but never before had it hit me so hard what He had to suffer that night and that the glory indeed be all to the Father. I love Him for everything He has done, does and always will do for His children. His is the plan that allows so much happiness and progression for me. His are the ears that my pleas fill daily. And I hope to come to know Him more through His Son.